


In Your Eyes

by slippingintothevoid



Category: Degrassi, Degrassi the Next Generation
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon Trans Character, Character Death Fix, F/M, Not Canon Compliant, Teen Angst, Trans Male Character, Transphobia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-12
Updated: 2020-12-12
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:48:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28004928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slippingintothevoid/pseuds/slippingintothevoid
Summary: Adam Torres just wants one thing... to be liked for who he truly is.
Relationships: Becky Baker/Adam Torres, Bianca DeSousa/Adam Torres, Bianca DeSousa/Drew Torres, Clare Edwards/Eli Goldsworthy, Fiona Coyne/Adam Torres, Katie Matlin/Drew Torres
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	In Your Eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: Adam is portrayed by Sam Collins, a trans YouTube star. Not Jordan Todosey. I'm sorry if that ruins him for you. Also, this is MY version of events but some things will match up to the show.

All [Adam Torres](https://www.instagram.com/p/M6jHxhN0zV/?igshid=dtzqtp7ztosq) wants is to just be himself. That's all he's asking for, the ability to just be, to just exist. Why does everything always have to be _against_ him? From his mother calling him Gracie to his older brother saying he's still his baby sister. And now? These fucking cramps are again, reminding him that he's never going to feel **100%** male. 

A sharp, scraping pain grinds against his lower abdomen. Intense cramps begin as he binds his chest with ace bandages; something that barely holds his chest down. Adam looks himself over, letting out a sigh as he winces from the pain. "Ow, _fuck_." Adam moans quietly as he grips the edge of the counter.

Son of a _bitch_.

He reaches for the bottle of Excedrin and pops two. Wishing, _wanting_ some **relief**.

"Hey, are you done in here yet?" Drew asks as he opens the door to the bathroom, Adam had just slipped his shirt on. 

"Yeah, pretty much." Adam replies, moving aside so he can let Drew put a shit ton of gel in his hair. "Don't use so much, Drew, your hair looks greasy enough." Adam teases, his brother rolls his eyes in response.

Adam opens the drawer to get his tampons, letting out a soft yet defeated sigh, as he grabs them. Drew doesn't even notice as he looks in the mirror; almost as if he was admiring himself. "Out...now," Drew comments as Adam shuts the bathroom door to give him some privacy.

* * *

The ride to Degrassi was nerve wracking. All Adam cared about was being himself; finally starting fresh as _himself_ and not as the trans kid. He knew himself well enough to know that this was his only shot. Changing schools, again, just wouldn't be an option. 

Adam bites his bottom lip as he gets out of the van, following Drew. Drew mentions that they're early and he goes to the coffee shop, The Dot, nearby to waste time. Adam, heads inside the school where he's noticed by Clare Edwards. Taking out the note card with his classes and locker number, he begins to head to his homeroom, as Clare follows him. "Hey, new guy?" she calls out, he turns around to lock eyes with Clare. He notices the beautiful blue eyes hidden behind oval frames and he smiles. "You are new here - right?" She asks and he nods.

"Yeah, I'm new. My name is Adam and you are?" He asks, she extends a hand and they shake hands. Adam starts to feel shy as she takes his note card to look at his classes. "Does anything look familiar?" He questions, she smiles in response.

"We have English literature and algebra together." Clare states and hands his card back to him. "C'mon, let's get to English," Clare adds, waving by to her friend Alli. Adam pushes his dark locks out of his face as he walks. 

* * *

The two walk into Ms. Dawes class and sit together. Ms. Dawes notices the new face and approaches his desk with a text book in hand. "You must be Adam?" She greets him an a friendly tone.

"Yeah, that's me!" He responds as he takes the book.

"Welcome, Adam! I hope you will enjoy Degrassi," she replies sweetly. It was truly a nice change for the sophomore. Already, he was secretly sighing with relief, and feeling welcomed at that.

He watches as other students file in; feeling shy and slightly insecure deep down. Adam was always awkward in new situations. He and his safety always come first. Luckily, no one seemed too threatening in this class. An goth boy sits next to him and watches Clare like a hawk. Adam furrows his brow and watches the goth watching his new friend.

"Uh, hi?" Adam speaks up, breaking the gaze the guy has on Clare. He looks back at Adam and smirks snarkily.

"Sup, Newbie? I'm Eli." Eli replies, again with the new kid bullshit. "Nice shirt." He adds, Adam looks down and shrugs.

"Thanks." Adam replies, not knowing if Eli was genuine or sarcastic with such a response. Adam didn't care, he just wanted the guy to stop gawking at his new friend.

"It's old as hell." He adds, looking down at the faded Looney Tunes shirt.

* * *

After class Adam heads to his locker with Clare by his side. "So, what's with Eli?" He asks as he opens his locker carefully. As he puts his stuff away, his hand slips into his bag, and he grabs a tampon. As he pulls his hand away, the bag slips, and the contents pour out. "Uh, help, please?" He mutters as he scrambles to put everything away.

"Silly me, always dropping my feminine hygiene products!" Clare exclaimed awkwardly as she helps Adam. Owen Milligan makes a face as he passes the two. 

"Gross.." he mutters, shaking his head as he walks by with his friends.

Once the tampons are picked up, Clare goes to comment about nose bleeds, but is left watching Adam walk away, down the hall.

Why did that have to happen? He couldn't figure it out. Of all days, today, he had to be humiliated. Suddenly he felt fear and dread again. He went from the safe, warm welcomes to this.

All he could do was hope Clare wouldn't say anything. 


End file.
